Batman: Gotham Tales
by punk-lord
Summary: After disappearing, the Riddler returns with a secret plan to unmask the bat and recruits the likes of Scarecrow, Harley Quinn, and more. R
1. Shark Bait, Part 1

**BATMAN: TALES OF GOTHAM**

**CHAPTER 1 - SHARK BAIT, Part 1**

The cold air blew softly. The darkness covered the city. Screams could be heard in the distance. About an hour ago, all of the power in Gotham City had been shut off. The cititzens didn't know why. The police didn't know why. The Batman didn't even know why.

Batman stood on top of a gargoyle that rested at the top of the Gotham City Hall. No one was on the street. Most everybody was trying to stay indoors, afraid to come out. Afraid of the darkness. Afraid of what was in the darkness.

Arkham Asylum was the main housing for supervillains in Gotham. The entire facility had electronic locks and doors. If all the power in Gotham went out, then all the power in Arkham went out meaning . . . they could escape. And they did.

Though Batman wasn't sure as to which villains did escape, he was sure that a lot of the powerful ones did. Without the radio towers operating in Gotham, the police couldn't communicate with each other, nor Batman.

About a month ago, The Riddler conned his way out of Arkham, tricking the guards into letting him go on a walk. The idiots...

Riddler was gone. Stole a police car and drove away with all the car's lights off, to make him difficult to track. Though a dangerous move, it was a clever one. And that was his game.

Then, about two weeks ago, Ms. Harleen Quinzel, or Harley Quinn, the Joker's henchwoman, was finally freed from Arkham with parole. She was supposedly cured, which for the most part was true. Batman knew that Harley's troubles mostly came from getting mixed up in the wrong crowds... The Joker's crowd, for instance.

Then, the Ridder came back to Gotham. No one knows where he went. But, when he came back, he was looking for a certain little jester girl. That's where the story begins. About a week ago, when Edward Nigma came back to town.

* * *

Edward Nigma, or The Riddler, stepped out of his dark green limousine sporting his green jacket, black button-up shirt, black pants with green shoes and green fadora, sporting a black question mark on it. His outfit was of course not complete without the complimentary black tie with green question mark.

The limo had pulled up to a back alley brick building. Music muffled from inside. Neon lights sprayed from the doorway. Riddler reached into the limo and pulled out his five-foot long, formal cane, shaped like a question mark.

Riddler walked to the front of the limo and peered inside. In the driver's and passenger's seats were his two henchmen, the recently recruited for his own uses: Tweedledum and Tweedledee.

"I shouldn't be _too _long, gentlemen," the Riddler grinned. The oversized goons nodded in acknowledgement and Riddler headed to the door of the club. He knocked on it once with his cane.

A small, sliding eye piece slid open. The eyes of a muscular brute peered down on him. He growled, "What do you want, _question-mark-man_?"

"Question Mark Man is my cousin, thank you," the Riddler put both hands on his cane. "I am here to see the - how can I put this in words _you_ would understand - I'm here to see the boss, I suppose."

"Are you calling me stupid?" the door opened, the brute revealing himself. He was nearly seven feet tall, towering over the Riddler.

The Riddler, being the clever man he was, said, "No, my friend, I am merely calling myself a bad conversationalist."

The brute eyed Nigma very carefully. He then looked back into the club, looking at someone that Riddler couldn't see. The brute looked back at Nigma and said, "Alright, but make it fast. He doesn't like visitors during this hour."

"I'll keep that in mind," the Riddler smirked walking past the guard.

It was an underground, illegal club. Loud music, bright lights, half-naked girls, drunken criminals. Hell, Riddler even recognized half the scum putting dollars in girls' panties, or demanding more drinks. Some of them were low-class bank robbers, but some others were the villains he once had respect for. Villains like Amygdala and Hugo Strange.

The Riddler walked over to a large booth at the back of the club, where the entire facility could be seen. Sitting in the booth was a strange man. His skin was as white as snow. He was bald, his eyes were red, his face was deformed. It was almost as if he had no lips with his sharp teeth visible at all times. He talked oddly, like he had trouble talking, almost. Several rough-looking men sat around him.

Riddler said, "And how are you, friend?"

The deformed-man looked up and immediately pulled a pistol on the Riddler, angered by his presence. He said, "What the hell do you want, Nigma?" At this moment, the four men with him stood up and surrounded Riddler, each with a pistol in their hand.

"You sure do treat your guests rudely, don't you?" The Riddler rolled his eyes, slipped past one of the gun-holding henchmen and sat down in the booth with him. "We go way back, Warren."

"Way back? Ha!" he laughed. "What have you ever done for me?"

"I'm about to do something big for you, Great White Shark," the Riddler crossed his legs, grinning mischievously.

Warren White, or the Great White Shark, cautiously lowered his pistol then ordered his men to do the same and sent them away. The guests in the club had never even noticed the guns drawn. They were too busy with the alcohol and women.

"What are you talking about, Riddler?" Great White asked, motioning a waitress over to the table. He ordered himself and the Riddler a drink. "You've been gone a long time, you know."

"Oh, I know," the Riddler laughed as his drink was delivered and he took a sip.

"What have you been doing? Thinking up new riddles?" Great White made fun of him.

"No, just pondering on old ones," the Riddler knew how to take insults.

"Like which ones?"

"Like the ultimate riddle of all time, my Great White friend," the Riddler put his drink on the table. "Who is the Batman?"

"Oh, Lord," Great White rolled his eyes and rested his head on his fist. "Not this again."

"What, what is it?" the Riddler was surprised at Great White's reaction.

"I don't even worry about him anymore, Nigma," Great White said matter-of-factly, "There's not really anything illegal going on here at a continuous rate, so he doesn't bother me here, so I'm happy. I got my booze, I got my girls, I got my guns!" He laughed.

"Yes, yes," the Riddler nodded, "And of course you have your drugs."

Great White's giant smile instantly turned to hate. He eyed the Riddler and whispered, "H-How did you know about that?"

"I'm the Riddler!" he laughed. "You can't keep secrets from me! Ha, ha!" Great White Shark glared at him heavily until the Riddler stopped laughing. Nigma cleared his throat, took another sip from his drink, then said, "I know about more than that."

"What else?" Great White pulled the hammer back on his gun from under the table, ready to shoot Nigma if he said anything wrong.

"I know it all, White," Riddler shrugged, "Jonathon Crane's new hallucigenic drug, the girls it's brought you, the money it's brought you." Great White didn't say anything. Riddler kept going, "I know you bought Crane's drugs, you kidnapped and drugged the girls so they'd work for you and the one's who aren't currently dancing, you're selling into prostitution. Brings in a lot of income, I understand."

Great White snapped, "And what, you're gonna rat me out if I don't help you or something?"

"No, no, my friend, I'm no rat, I promise," the Riddler waved his hands in defense. "But, it's no surprise to you that Mr. Crane was arrested not too long ago, right?"

Great White took a breath. "Yes, I was aware."

"No Crane, no drugs." Riddler shrugged. "No drugs, no money. Did this not worry you?"

"I did take it into consideration, yes."

"Listen, White," the Riddler readjusted himself in his seat, "Harleen Quinzel went missing about three or four days ago. Know anything about it?"

"What are you, a cop now or something?" Great White hissed.

"Answer the question, White," Riddler was growing impatient. This was taking longer than he had hoped.

"I don't know any Harleen Quinzel."

"Know a Harley Quinn?"

Great White sighed and said, "Yes."

"This is what's going to happen," Riddler said. "You're going to get Harley Quinn off these drugs you have then - "

"Who said she's here? On the drugs?" Great White cocked his eyebrow.

"Don't play me the fool, White," Riddler shook his head. "I have a plan, White. But, I need Harley Quinn in order to do it."

"What is your plan?" Great White asked.

"Ha, ha!" Riddler laughed. "What's big and black and not coming back?"

"I don't have time for this," Great White Shark stood up from the booth and began to walk off.

Riddler shrugged and propped his feet up on the table and called to him, "It's only a matter of time before you'll need another shipment from Crane. Too bad he's locked up."

Great White stopped in his tracks and spun around. "Just tell me what I get out of all of this."

The Riddler stood up, face to face with Great White Shark, "You help me, and I promise that ol' Scarecrow will be out of Arkham just in time to whip you up some more goods." He grinned.

The music in the club changed. The lights dimmed. Great White and the Riddler both looked to the stage as a DJ yelled into his microphone, "Alright, folks, get ready to give it up for tonight's main attraction!"

Great White glanced back at the Riddler and said, "You're just in time."

The Riddler shot him a glare of impatience then walked closer to the stage, Great White Shark standing behind him.

The DJ said, "You love her, you hate her, you'd smoke her, the female joker! Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Ms. Harley Quinn!"

The crowd went wild. Out from behind the curtains, Harley Quinn stumbled out. She wore a revealing, skimpy red and black outfit. He blonde hair was in pigtails and she wore a black mask over her eyes, just like her old costume. She could barely stand up straight, due to the drugs. Harley made her way to a pole in the stage and began pole-dancing, much to the delight of the crowd.

The Riddler couldn't believe that the Great White Shark would kidnap someone that was respected as much as Harley Quinn and turn her into a stripper. He turned around to say something to him, but a strong blow to his head knocked him unconscious.

The Great White Shark and his henchmen stood over the unconscious body of the Riddler. Great White said to one of his goons that was holding a baseball bat, "Good work. This oughta teach him to go snooping around in other peoples' business."

"What should we do with him?" one of his henchmen asked.

Great White lit a cigar and stuck it in his mouth. He grinned, "Put him in the freezer."


	2. Shark Bait, Part 2

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 2 - SHARK BAIT, Part 2**

Tweedledum and Tweedledee sat in the front seats of the Riddler's limo. The engine was shut off, the headlights were off. They played cards under a small interior light, waiting for their boss to return. They could hear music coming from the club.

Tweedledum said, "I wish he'd hurry the hell up. I'm hungry."

"You're always hungry!" Tweedledee replied.

Driving by the alley, a two police officers in a cop car noticed the parked limo. Officer Mendez looked over at Officer Hanson driving. Mendez said, "Hey, maybe we should check it out?"

Hanson nodded and slowly pulled their car into the alleyway. Tweedledum and Tweedledee immediately saw the lights behind them and each prepared a small submachine gun, equipped with silencers, in case anyone tried anything.

Mendez said, "You can wait here, I'll check it out."

As Mendez was getting out of the car, Hanson laughed, "It's probably just a couple of teenagers on their way home from a date or something."

"In a limo?" Mendez chuckled, shutting the car door of the police car. With a flash light and his hand on his pistol, just in case, Mendez approached the driver's window of the limo.

He pecked on it with his flashlight as Tweedledum rolled the window down. He grinned nervously, "Yes, officer?"

Hanson sat in the cop car, watching Mendez. Then, Hanson's attention was drawn to the license plate of the car. It read: ???

Hanson's heart skipped a beat. He immediately knew it was the Riddler's car. He opened his car door, jumped out of the car and yelled for Mendez. Mendez turned his head to look at Hanson but it was too late. Tweedledum opened fire with his silenced machine gun, mowing down Mendez right on the pavement.

Hanson grabbed his radio and yelled into it, "We have an officer down on 19th street! We need back-up now!"

Hanson couldn't say another word. Tweedledee came around the other side of the car and emptied his clip into Hanson. The two obese villains then decided it was time to leave, Riddler or no Riddler. They got back in the limo and sped off as fast as they could.

* * *

The Riddler slowly opened his eyes. He blinked a few times then began shivering as he felt a cold chill as he realized he was hanging upside down. His hands were tied behind his back and his feet tied together, tied to a bar towards the ceiling. He was in a freezer. Meat was hanging from the ceiling too. Riddler almost thought it was funny, in a way. He also noticed that, having been hanging upside down, his hat had fallen off, lying on the floor under him.

Surrounding his hanging body were five men, armed with machine guns, their eyes fixed on Riddler. In front of him was Warren White, or the Great White Shark with a machete in his hand, already coated with blood.

Despite the blade and the guns, the first thing Riddler said after regaining consciousness was, "Could you hand me my hat?" he asked with a smile.

Great White Shark touched the tip of the machete's blade and smiled evilly, "Ooh, that's a sharp blade."

"Well, I suppose it'd be better than a dull one, after all," the Riddler said.

"I'm gonna gut you like a fish," Great White snarled in Riddler's face.

"Or, gut me like a shark?" Riddler laughed, angering Great White.

"Want me to shoot him, boss?" one henchmen stuck his machine gun barrel in Nigma's mouth.

"No!" Great White back-handed the henchmen, knocking him back into a piece of meat, then to the ground, his machine gun hitting the floor hard, shooting a bullet back into the freezer, into another hanging piece of meat.

Everyone in the freezer was startled by the gunshot. Great White picked the goon up by his collar and growled, "Why don't you be more careful, you idiot? Those guns aren't toys!"

"But you knocked me down!" the henchman grunted, getting out of Great White's grip.

Furious, Great White stabbed the goon in the stomach with his machete and pulled it back out in the same second, blood pouring out and the dead goon hitting the floor. The other henchmen snapped to attention, fearing they'd be next.

Great White shook some of the blood off his machete turning back to the Riddler. He sighed, "It's so hard to find good help these days."

"You know, _I_ have loyal henchmen. Not ones that are totally incompetent either," Riddler smiled proudly.

One of Great White's goons angerily yelled, "Hey, shut the hell up! We're not - "

"Quiet!" Great White barked at him. "I don't want to hear another word out of any of you!"

"Riddle me this, White," the Riddler cleared his throat, "What's going to happen to your business if you can't get the drugs off of Crane anymore?"

"Let _me_ worry about that, Nigma," Great White stuck the blade to Riddler's throat. "It's about time someone shut you up."

"I couldn't agree more, my friend," Riddler nodded sarcastically, "After all, people tend to go crazy after a while if - "

"Shut up!" Great White shouted, sticking the blade closer to his neck.

"Oh come on, just kill him!" one goon shouted.

"Oooh, I bet Mr. White didn't like that little outburst," the Riddler chuckled.

Before anymore could be said, a door on the other end of the freezer burst open. Several cops piled in. They yelled, "Freeze! Gotham City police! Nobody move!"

Great White's henchmen took cover behind slabs of meat and opened fire on the cops as Great White angrily headed back out towards the club, leaving the Riddler dangling.

"I must ask," the Riddler yelled over the gunfire, "Please nobody hit me with any stray bullets!"

The Great White Shark came back into the main area of the club to see that his henchmen were already in a firefight with the police. The guests were screaming, trying to get out whether it be by running out doors or jumping through windows.

A back door to the club burst open as two more police officers came in. Great White made his way to them and stabbed the first one, then slashed the other across the neck. Then, he realized fear.

Darkness swooped down, landing right in front of him. Its pointy ears, its dark aura, its bullet proof armor. The Great White Shark was standing face to face with his greatest enemy . . . The Batman.

Great White snarled as he took a swing at Batman, but the Dark Knight grabbed Great White's wrist and twisted it, causing him to drop the machete. Using his other hand, Batman punched Great White hard in the chin, knocking him to the ground.

One of Great White's henchmen swung around seeing him and screamed, "It's the Batman!"

Batman, though, threw a batarang, knocking the gun from his hand before he could fire at him. Two more henchmen pointed their guns, ready to shoot, but Batman shot his grappling hook at one henchmen, wrapping it around him and pulled on him, knocking him into the second one. The remaining henchmen had either been shot or gave up. The cops piled in, handcuffing each goon. Batman turned to see that Great White Shark was gone. He must've gotten up and ran. Then, he noticed a swinging door towards the back of the club, still swinging . . . like someone had just gone through it. Someone like Great White Shark.

Batman slowly walked through the door. He was in a freezer. Meat was hanging everywhere. Plenty of hiding places. Bodies of cops and Great White's henchmen were scattered. But the first thing that caught his attention was the Riddler, hanging upside down.

"Oh, hello," the Riddler happily said.

"What are _you_ doing here?" Batman slowly approached him, ready for anything.

"Just hanging out. And yourself?" Riddler asked with a smile.

"Where's Great White Shark?" Batman asked impatiently.

"Oh, he's in here somewhere. Not sure where. Lot's of places to hide in here," the Riddler nodded, looking around.

Batman grabbed Nigma by the hair and brought him closer, growling, "Tell me _now_ Riddler, where is he?"

Riddler, being the violent, temperimental psychopath he was, snapped at Batman ferosiously, "You think I wouldn't tell you if I knew where he was, Batman? Who do you think hung me up here?" The Riddler then calmed down and said, "Oh, and by the way . . . look out."

Batman let go of Riddler and turned around just in time to see Great White Shark charging for him. Great White threw a punch but Batman knocked his fist away and kicked him in the stomach. Great White didn't go down though. He threw another punch at Batman, landing this one right in Batman's cheek. Batman didn't slow down though. He kicked at Great White's feet, knocking his legs out from under him, sending him to the ground.

Batman went in for the takedown and as he tried to punch Great White in the face, Great White opened his mouth and bit down on Batman's fist with his sharp teeth. Batman screamed as he took a step back and Great White got back to his feet.

"Better get back in there, Batman," the Riddler said, "Sharks can smell blood. And when they do, you can't stop them."

Great White punched Batman in the face, then again, then again. However, that was Great White's last lucky shot. He threw another punch but Batman grabbed his fist and squeezed it hard, taking Great White to his knees, his hand in pain. He used his other hand to try and grab Batman but the Dark Knight grabbed his wrist and squeezed it too. Then, Batman headbutted Great White hard! Great White flew back onto the floor unconscious, out of the fight.

Several police officers rushed in at this moment, followed by Commissioner Gordon. The police pointed their guns at Great White as he was rushed out of the building, outside to an armored vehicle to be taken where he belonged.

Gordon said to Batman, "We found a lot of stuff that White was hiding in the back. Drugs, guns, girls."

"Oh yes," the Riddler joined in on the conversation, still hanging upside down, "Great White Shark was actually running a prostitution ring."

"What's he doing here?" Gordon asked Batman.

"I don't know," Batman approached the Riddler, eyeing him carefully.

"I was here on important detective duty, you see," the Riddler nodded.

"You're a wanted criminal," Gordon glared at him. "You escaped from Arkham Asy - "

"Yes, true, but you'll also note by looking in my records that I checked myself into Harber Bridge Asylum and was cured within a month, being released. It's in my file. You can check it, Commissioner."

"You'd think I would've heard about something like that," Gordon rubbed his chin.

"Yes, yes, of course," the Riddler rolled his eyes. "Because you seem to be so on top of things after all. I mean, it only took you six months to discover Great White Shark's prostitution business."

"Quiet!" Gordon snapped.

"What were you doing here, if it wasn't causing trouble?" Batman asked.

"If you recall, Harley Quinn was released from Arkham. Then, only days after being released, she went missing. Well, I found her!" The Riddler happily said.

"She's here?" Batman asked.

"Yes, I do believe that's what I'm implying," the Riddler nodded. "Great White Shark kidnapped her. He drugged her too. I was here on investigation business. But, I seemed to had poked the shark a little too much, so he hung me in here. His men were about to kill me before your police force showed up actually. Lucky me."

"What happened to them?" Gordon asked.

"Well, your cops gunned down a few. Only one of your cops remained actually, but when Great White ran back in, he killed him too. Bashed his head into the wall. It was quite . . . gruesome." Riddler nodded. "Not White, not you Commissioner, not anyone seems to have effective henchmen these days. Except myself."

"Yeah, 'cuz your henchmen shot a couple cops then left you for dead in your limo," Gordon crossed his arms. "Real loyal henchmen."

"If they had not shot the cop, you never would've showed up, and I would'nt be alive right now," Riddler smiled.

Gordon sighed and looked at Batman, "You're sure I can't arrest him for anything?"

"We'll look up his file, like he said to do," Batman glared at Riddler then turned to Gordon. "See if Harley Quinn was among the girls your men found in the back rooms."

Gordon nodded and walked away. Batman helped the Riddler down and to his feet. The Riddler dusted himself off and then picked up his hat and put it back on his head.

"Well, thank you Batman, I guess," the Riddler crossed his arms. "I hope I may one day return the favor."

Batman actually smiled at the Riddler. Not sure whether or not he was sincere about what he said, Batman just took it as a yes and left it at that. Gordon then returned to them. He said, "Yeah, we got her."

Batman, Gordon, and even the Riddler went into the back rooms of the club. Cops were helping girls all over the place back to their feet, trying to sober them up. Several cops stood around Harley Quinn sitting on the ground, leaned up against the wall.

"Quinn," Batman knelt down to her. "Can you remember anything?"

"Bats?" she asked quietly, then slowly fell asleep.

"I think she'll be okay," Batman said. "You should probably take her, along with the rest of these girls, to the hospital though."

"Yeah, we will," Gordon nodded. He looked at Riddler. "Any idea where White was getting these drugs?"

"Not a damned clue," the Riddler shook his head, lying to them. "But, if you gentlemen will excuse me, I must be on my way."

"Do you think we're gonna let you go?" Gordon asked, with a chuckle. "Your henchmen killed two of our officers."

"I did not order it though, did I?" the Riddler snapped. "I didn't kill anyone. Hell, I've not even thrown a punch since I've been here. I've not done anything wrong!"

"Men, take Mr. Nigma back to headquarters for questioning," Gordon ordered two of his officers. They nodded and handcuffed Riddler.

"You know, this is why I left Gotham in the first place," the Riddler sighed as he was escorted out. "You get arrested for anything these days!" He laughed as the door closed and he was out of sight.

Gordon looked at Batman and said, "I don't think the Riddler was here to find missing girls."

"Obviously not," Batman agreed. "I want to talk to Great White Shark. He may have a few answers as to why the Riddler was here." Batman headed for the door but stopped and turned back to Gordon. "Also, get ahold of me when Harley comes to. I want to talk to her _as well._"

Batman then walked out the door and disappeared into the night. Gordon wiped sweat from his forehead and said to himself, "It's been a helluva night."


	3. Interrogation

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 3 - INTERROGATION**

Great White Shark sat in the interrogation room at the Gotham City police department. He was handcuffed as Commissioner Gordon talked to him with Batman watching from behind the glass.

"Where did you get the drugs from?" Gordon asked, slamming his hands on the table.

Great White Shark calmly replied, "Didn't your little riddle buddy tell you?"

"I want _you _to tell me," Gordon said, as calmly as he could.

"I was getting the drugs from Doctor Jonathon Crane," Great White gave in and ratted Crane out. "He was making them for me."

"And what did he get out of it?" Gordon asked.

"What else?" Great White shrugged, "What does this city run on, Gordon? Money! I paid him in cash for the drugs!"

"What would Crane want so bad with so much cash?" Gordon pondered out loud.

"He's a crazy doctor who dresses up like a scarecrow! How the hell should I know?" Great White shook his head, getting bored of the questions. "Besides, it's not like anything was going on anymore anyway. Crane got locked up in Arkham. We were out of business."

Gordon looked at him oddly. "He wasn't locked up in Arkham Asylum," Gordon shook his head.

"Crane didn't get arrested for the drugs?" Great White cocked an eyebrow.

"Crane was sent to Blackgate Penitentiary for burning down Dr. Boone's lab. He was charged with arson," Gordon stated.

Great White Shark was shocked. A great villain like Scarecrow was sent to prison because he burned down a building? Batman then entered the room. Gordon noticed him and walked out.

"Batman!" Great White cheered.

"Shut up," Batman growled. "Why was the Riddler in your club last night?"

"The punk-ass idiot came to me with some damn offer," Great White rolled his eyes.

"What offer?"

"Don't know!" Great White smirked. "Son of a bitch wouldn't actually come out with it. Just kept throwing stupid riddles at me and demanding to see Harley Quinn. He said he needed Harley in order to execute his _big plan._"

"And you have no idea what his plan may have been?" Batman crossed his arms, happy that White was cooperating.

"Not a one," Great White shook his head. "And I tell ya, Batman, I'd tell you if I knew. I'd love to see that little twerp back in Arkham!" Great White snarled a bit. "I think he's up to something, Batman."

Batman rolled his eyes at Great White sucking up to him, then left the room.

* * *

Now, was the Riddler's turn. He sat in the interrogation room, speaking to Batman with Gordon watching through the glass. Unlike Great White though, Riddler was not handcuffed.

"Please, tell me what you want, Batman," the Riddler sighed. "I'm a very busy man."

"Why were you at White's club?" Batman asked.

"I told you," he replied, "I had heard that Harley Quinn was missing and that Warren White was running a prostitution ring. I put two and two together and I found Harley."

"I don't think that was why you were originally dropping in to pay White a visit," Batman said, squinting his eyes at Nigma.

"Yes it is, Batman!" the Riddler innocently yelled. "I am good now. Harley is good now. I want to help other good people."

"Well," Batman shrugged, "According to the Great White Shark, you came in with some offer. Some big plan where you needed Harley."

"Great White Shark is not exactly the smartest fish in the sea, no pun intended," Riddler cleared his throat, "What was I supposed to say to him? Hey, Shark, I'm here to bust your main attraction out and run you out of business!"

Batman eyed him. The Riddler was indeed a very clever person. It was sometimes hard to tell if he was lying or not. Batman then said, "Did you know that Great White was getting his drugs off Jonathon Crane?"

"No," the Riddler sighed, wanting to leave.

"You're sure?"

"Yes!" the Riddler stood up, slamming his hands on the table. "Batman, this is the reason people like me go crazy. I have literally done nothing wrong and you're keeping me captive in here!"

Batman shook his head and left the room as the Riddler sat back down. Gordon said to Batman, "Do you think he's lying?"

"It's hard to tell," Batman looked at the Riddler through the glass. He just sat there. "He's hard to read." Batman looked back at Gordon and said, "I suppose we have no choice but to let him go, Commissioner."

"I guess so," Gordon nodded. "Well, Batman, thank you for coming in here for the interrogation." He smiled at him, shaking his hand. "Harley Quinn is still in the hospital, though. She's apparently not doing so well."

"I understand," Batman nodded. And with that, Batman left.

Gordon looked back at the Riddler. He listened carefully through the microphone that amplified the room. He thought for a moment that the Riddler was actually talking to himself. It almost sounded like he was saying, "Riddle me this, riddle me that, fear is the next clue for the black bat."

Gordon gritted his teeth, annoyed by the Riddler's antics and shut the mic off. He ordered his men to inform the Riddler he could go home, then Gordon went home himself.


	4. Breaking Out of Blackgate

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 4 - BREAKING OUT OF BLACKGATE**

"What is this?" a Blackgate guard pulled a knife from the Riddler's back pocket and showed it to him.

"Oops," the Riddler embarrassingly smiled, "Forgot about that one."

The Riddler was at Blackgate Penitentiary. But, he wasn't arrested. He was there for a visit. Upon stepping into the prison, he had triggered every alarm with hidden weapons all over his person. Finally, though, they were all taken.

"Now that you're done stealing my stuff," the Riddler straigtened his question mark tie, "I'd like to go visit my _friend._"

The guard nodded, motioning another guard over. He said, "I'll take you to the visitor's section."

"Thank you," Riddler smiled at him, shooting a glare back at the guard who had confiscated his weapons.

* * *

"Crane!" a voice yelled from down the hall. "You have a visitor!"

Jonathon Crane rose up off of his cot, having been reading a book, and looked oddly in the direction of the yell. He wondered, _who in the world would be here to visit me?_ Crane closed his book and hopped off his bed as guards came and escorted him to a visitor's area. In here, many people were visiting, most of them families, it appeared. But there, sitting at a table was the last person that Crane expected.

"Nigma?" Crane was shocked as the guards sat him down and walked away.

"How are you, Dr. Crane?" the Riddler smiled, taking his hat off, setting it on the table.

"What do you want?" Crane didn't like wasting time.

"Why were you arrested, my friend?" Riddler asked.

"I will not explain myself to you, Nigma," Crane got up to walk away.

"But, Dr. Crane, I need your help," Riddler frowned. Crane stopped and turned back to him. Slowly, Crane got back in his seat, tempted to hear the offer. Riddle smiled and said, "I apparently have a way with words. I've changed a lot of minds lately." Riddler then got back to business. He said to Crane, "Okay, listen _Scarecrow_, we need your help."

"We?" Crane asked.

"Harley Quinn and I," the Riddler answered.

"Harley Qui - "

"Yes, Harley Quinn," the Riddler glared, wanting to finish what he was saying. "I have a plan."

"We've established that, Nigma," Crane crossed his arms, also wanting Riddler to finish what he was saying. "Out with it, already!"

"We need your toxin so Harley Quinn can get into Arkham Asylum," Riddler whispered, only loud enough for Crane to hear. "Harley used to work there, so she should have the security codes, somewhere back in her thick head."

"I used to work there too, you know," Crane said.

"Oh, I know," Riddler nodded. "Trust me . . . Harley was not my first choice. You were. But, I looked in to it while I was away and it appears that Scarecrow caused a lot of damage to the computer systems a while back. Had to reset _everything_ in Arkham. But, Harley's worked there since then, so she should know."

"In theory," Crane nodded. "What are you doing once we get into Arkham?"

"I'm trying to solve that unsolvable riddle, as usual," Riddler shrugged. "We need to get Batman to come to us. So, we break into Arkham, bust out someone he'd follow, and set a trap."

"And who are you busting out?"

"Think about it," Riddler grinned. "What pair are absolutely purrr-fect, Dr. Crane?"

"You think Batman will go after her?"

"I _know _he will," the Riddler said something with a serious tone for the first time all day.

The guards then returned. One grabbed Crane by the arm and drug him away violently while the other glared at Riddler and said, "Okay, visiting hours are over, time to go!"

"Already? Aww, darn," the Riddler shook his head, grabbing his hat, being escorted towards the exit. As they walked, the Riddler happily said, "Excuse me, good sir, when are the next visiting hours?"

The guard ignored him as he led him to the front entrance.

"Good sir," the Riddler repeated himself. "When are the next visiting hours?"

The guard ignored him, not wanting to chat with ex-villains.

"Sir," the Riddler said, a little more stern.

"The next visiting hours are Tuesday at two o'clock!" the guard snapped.

Riddler, offended, put his hat on and said as they stopped at the door, "What can you hold without ever touching?"

The guard stared blankly, trying to figure out the answer. He rubbed his head and shrugged embarrassingly, "Uh . . . I don't know."

"A conversation," the Riddler stuck up his chin. "Learn how to hold one." And with that, he left Blackgate.

* * *

That night, Dr. Crane lay awake in his cot, staring at the ceiling. Blackgate was no place for him. This was the place for common criminals, petty theives, the actual _crazy_ people. Arkham Asylum was nothing compared to this. At least they respected you at Arkham.

Things had finally quietened down. The only thing heard was the snoring of the inmates . . . and a clanging noise.

Crane rose up, curious as to what the noise was. He walked to the bars of his cell to here a _clang . . . clang . . . clang _noise coming closer. He poked his head out and saw a guard slowly walking towards him, clanging his flashlight on every bar of every cell. Something particularlly odd about the guard was how obese he was. Plus, right behind the guard was another one, identical to him, just as fat. The second one was saying, "Bring out your dead. Bring out your dead." It was Tweedledum and Tweedledee. They had guard outfits on.

They stopped at Crane's cell. Tweedledum said, "Is there a problem, Mr. Crane?"

Crane was confused. Why would these two be here? He never even liked them. They were annoying. "Why are _you _here?" he asked.

Tweedledee continued to say, "Bring out your dead. Bring out your - _ow!_" Tweedledum smacked him on the top of the head with the flashlight.

"Enough!" Tweedledum glared at his cousin. He looked back to Crane. "Dr. Crane, you have a visitor."

"What are you talking about?" Crane gripped the bars tight, angry at their ignorance. Crane then noticed something at his feet. Water was coming into his cell. It was all over the floor of the prison. Wait... it wasn't water. It was gasoline. He could smell it now.

Tweedledum opened the cell door and he and his cousin led Crane out and up some stairs to an upper level. Crane was surprised to see Riddler leaning up against a rail, looking down at the gasoline-soaked first floor.

"Riddle me this, Crane," Riddler grinned, reaching into his pocket. "How do you start a fire with only one stick?" Crane didn't answer, he just waited and watched. The Riddler pulled out a small box from his pocket and said, "Use a match." He struck a match and threw it down onto the first floor. The room ignited in flame, the inmates burning to a crisp.

Alarms went off, sprinklers were activated. The four villains made their way to a stairwell and began walking down the stairs. Crane said, "Riddler, what's going on? Why did - "

"I said I needed your help, didn't I?" the Riddler said as they continued to walk. "So, I busted you out, friend. But, Arkham won't be such an easy place to break _in _to. My Tweed friends won't be enough for that."

Tweedledum glared at him, "Well, thanks a lot, Riddler."

"Be quiet," the Riddler ordered.

The four got to the bottom of the stairs and walked out a door to be outside where the Riddler's limo rested. Crane said, "How did you all even manage to - "

"Let _us_ worry about that, friend," the Riddler smiled as they walked towards the car.

A gunshot echoed. Riddler spun around to see a guard had followed them and shot Tweedledee in the shoulder. He was on the ground in pain, his cousin trying to help him. "Get in the car," Riddler said to Crane.

Crane got in the passenger side as the Riddler headed for the driver's side. He saw it was the same guard who had been rude to him earlier that day and yelled to the guard, "Mr. Guard-Man! What's the world's biggest crook?"

The guard fired a shot, shattering the back window of his car.

The Riddler answered his riddle. "Atlas! He held up the world!" Then, he got in the car and sped away.

The guard's backup arrived just in time. They arrested Tweedledum and Tweedledee as one guard called Commissioner Gordon. Once Gordon answered, he said, "Gordon, this is Paxton." he said, "Our alarm here in Blackgate were cut. We had a break-in."

"Break-_in_?" Gordon asked.

"Well, someone broke in to break someone out," the guard, Paxton, rubbed his head as he watched the Tweed cousins be taken back into the prison, struggling to get free.

"Who was it?" Gordon demanded to know.

"Sir, I think it was the Riddler. Well, I _know_ it was the Riddler. He broke Scarecrow out."

"Scarecrow? I knew it was a bad idea keeping him there," Gordon sighed. "Anyone after them?"

"Well, sir, we were going to chase after them, but it seems that the Riddler and his men thought ahead," Paxton was sweating.

"What in the hell are you talking about?!"

Paxton gulped looking behind him as he and other cops were in complete shock that all of their police cars had been sabotaged. Most of them had flat tires, some had engine damage, one's roof was even caved in. Paxton said back into the phone, "We're gonna need some back-up."


	5. Two Sides to Every Story

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 5 - TWO SIDES TO EVERY STORY**

Commissioner Gordon stood at the entrance of Blackgate where he spoke to Paxton among other guards. Gordon said, "So, tell me _exactly_ what happened."

"I told ya, sir," Paxton took a hankerchief from his pocket and wiped his forehead. "The Riddler broke in and busted that Scarecrow guy out! Crane, I think is his name!"

"How did the Riddler break in? And, burn an entire room of inmates, along with it?!" Gordon threw his arms up and walked away, not even wanting to hear Paxton's lame excuse.

Gordon walked back towards his car and stopped. He put his hands in his pockets and leaned up against the car saying, "What took ya so long?"

Batman stepped out of the shadows. He said, "Sorry, Jim, traffic was rough."

"So, the Riddler _was_ lying to us," Gordon took a long breath.

"Yes," Batman agreed, "But what he actually wants with Crane, I'm not sure. I don't think it's drugs . . . at least, not the same ones that Great White Shark wanted. Must be something else."

"Fear toxin?" Gordon suggested.

"Most likely," Batman nodded. "If the Riddler keeps up this trend, I'd say he's going for Harley Quinn next. He seems awfully interested in her lately."

"Yeah, that thought crossed my mind," Gordon replied. "Already got men on it. They're guarding every entrance to that room. Doors, windows . . . hell, even got a guy making sure nobody's in the ventilation shafts. I don't want to risk _anything_."

"Good call," Batman said. "I hear that Tweedledum and Tweedledee were with the Riddler?"

"Yeah, yeah, they were," Gordon bobbed his head, "Stray bullet hit one of 'em. He'll be alright though, just a minor wound. Apparently the Riddler recruited them. They won't talk though."

Batman clenched a fist and said, "_I'll _make them talk."

__________________________________________________________________________________

Batman sat in an interrogation room of Blackgate, Tweedledum sitting across from him. Batman, trying to remain as calm as possible, said, "What is the Riddler up to?"

"He doesn't tell us nothin'!" Tweedledum crossed his arms.

"If you tell me why - "

"Why should I tell you anything?" Tweedledum yelled, "Your cops shot my cousin!"

"He'll be fine," Batman assured him.

"Listen, Bats, the Riddler didn't tell us nothing. The deal was: we help him, we get rich, no questions asked. But, as we watched his plan unfold, we began to realize that we weren't gonna be gettin' no money out of it."

"What do you mean?"

"He's a wack-job, Bats!" Tweedledum said. "Always talkin' in riddles. He's been crazier than usual lately, too. Didn't tell us why we were breaking Scarecrow out, or why we were invading Great White Shark's club."

Batman interrupted, "What about Harley Quinn? Did he say why he wanted her?"

"Harley Quinn? Is that the one with the plant powers?"

"No, she's the Joker's sidekick. His girlfriend."

"Oh, the jester-girl? He didn't talk about her much. Just said that Great White Shark was holding her captive, or something. I just wanted my money, I didn't care about the details."

"I thought you said there was no money?"

"Well, I didn't learn that till lately. He kept talking about some ultimate riddle. The loon kept saying," Tweedledum began to mock the Riddler, "I know I'm going to get arrested after this, possibly even killed, but I _have_ to know the answer to the riddle!"

"The riddle?" Batman pondered.

"Hey, can someone bring me some food?" Tweedledum asked but Batman ignored him and walked out of the interrogation room and over to Gordon, who was waiting for him to finish.

"I'm sorry you keep having to interrogate our criminals, Batman," Gordon joked.

Batman smiled and said, "Don't worry about it, Jim. I'm going to try and track down the Riddler and Scarecrow."

"Any leads?"

"They're on their way to Harley Quinn," Batman said. "I just know it."

Batman left Blackgate and walked towards the Batmobile parked outside. Right when he opened up the hatch, he heard a beeping noise, then an explosion threw him back against the wall. His vision was blurry and there was a ringing in his ears, but he could still hear people. He heard cops run outside and someone yell, "Boss, grab the Bat! We'll handle these pigs!"

"No, everyone back to the car!" the _boss_ returned the shout. Batman recognized his voice. It was like two people were talking at once when he spoke. Then, he blacked out.

______________________________________________________________________________

Batman opened his eyes. It took a moment, but his vision returned to him. He heard the sound of water and realized he was on a boat, in the middle of the Gotham river. He looked around and saw several thugs, dressed in suits with machine guns pointed at him. Then, he realized he was tied to an anchor that was positioned over the water.

A door on the boat opened and a familiar foe appeared. Two-Face.

"Harvey," Batman said, his eyes shooting open. "Let me down!"

"I don't think so, Batman," Two-Face slowly walked up to him, flipping his coin on his thumb. He grabbed it in his palm and pocketed it.

"What are you doing, Harvey? What happened?" Batman could barely remember a thing.

"We heard that there was a breakout at Blackgate," Two-Face explained, his hands in his pockets as he continued, "I just knew you'd show up so I thought I'd make it a special occasion for us."

Batman sighed, saying, "Harvey, I don't have time for this. I'm chasing - "

"Riddler?" Two-Face finished his sentence. "Yeah, there's been talk about him lately. But, I don't care about him, personally."

As they talked, Batman had already begin work on untying himself with his hands behind his back unknowingly to Two-Face or his thugs. Batman said, trying to stall, "Harvey, don't do this."

"Hard to believe you're gonna go _down_ like this," Two-Face shrugged. "Then again," he pulled his coin from his pocket. "I guess I could give you a fifty-fifty chance."

"Hey, uh, boss," one thug intervened. "Why not just shoot him in the face right now instead of using a coin toss to decided what to do?"

Two-Face slowly turned to his goon, his head titled on the side out of anger and shock. Two-Face flipped the coin and he caught it, then slapping it on his forearm. He was scarred-side up. Two-Face took his pistol and shot the thug in the chest, startling his other henchmen. Two-Face then turned back to Batman and said, "Where were we?"

"Harvey, if you let me down right now, I'll pretend I never saw you," Batman was eager to find the Riddler and stop his plan.

Two-Face ignored him. "Scarred-side up, we drop anchor. Scarred-side down, we break your neck." He shrugged with a grin. He flipped the coin.

As the coin was flying through the air, Batman got free of the ropes and kicked Two-Face in the chest, sending him back into some wooden barrels. The coin hit the deck of the boat and began rolling away. Two-Face saw it and yelled, "No!" as he began chasing after it.

One thug pointed his machine gun at Batman but the Dark Knight pulled the gun from his hands and hit him across the face with it, then backflipped, striking another thug in the head which ultimately caused him to fire his gun, shooting a rope, dropping a net on three more thugs who were about to shoot Batman.

Two-Face finally caught up to the coin as it stopped rolling and landed on scarred-side down. He clenched a fist, but then calmed down saying, "Well, I guess we gotta break your neck." He stood up and looked behind him to see all of his henchmen defeated. His mouth dropped open, but he saw Batman no where. "There's five of you! You all five had guns! How did he beat you?!" Two-Face furiously yelled at his men.

Batman then dropped down and attacked Two-Face, but the former DA was quick to react. He blocked Batman's punch and swiped his legs out from under him. Batman tried to kick him but Two-Face dodged it and grabbed one of his henchmen's machine guns. He swung around to shoot but Batman kicked him across the face, startling Two-Face, causing him to fire his gun into some explosive barrels at the front of the ship. They went up in flames, catching the boat on fire.

Two-Face became nervous. He threw the gun at Batman and dove off the edge of the ship, into the water. Batman was about to chase him, but he knew if he left the thugs there, they'd die in the inevitable explosion. He one-by-one tossed each thug to safety in the water, waking the unconscious ones and they all headed towards the shore.

Batman then dove into the water just as the boat exploded.

Two-Face emerged as he climbed up onto a dock on the Gotham mainland. He was laughing to himself as he walked back towards land, away from the water, looking back to see the boat in flames, hoping . . . wishing that Batman had been caught in the explosion. He flipped his coin once in the air and caught it in his palm, about to slam it onto his forearm when he was caught off guard.

"Don't move," a voice said.

Two-Face turned to see Detective Harvey Bullock and a few other police officers with their guns pointed at him.

Bullock said, "You're under arrest, Dent."

Two-Face frowned, then put his coin on his forearm to see his fate and saw it was scarred-side up. He put the coin in his pocket and put his hands behind his back as the cops handcuffed him and just grunted to himself, "Crap."


	6. Light My Fire, Part 1

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 6 - LIGHT MY FIRE, PART 1**

The Riddler's limo drove into a back alley and Riddler and Crane stepped out of the car. They were at Great White's old, now abandoned, club. Riddler said, as they walked in, "Crane, old friend, why did you go and start that fire that got you thrown in jail?"

"I didn't," Crane glared at him. "I didn't burn down Dr. Boone's lab."

Riddler flipped on the lights to reveal the place was empty. They closed and locked the door as Riddler took a seat in Great White Shark's personal booth with Crane sitting down in a chair across from him.

The Riddler shrugged, "Then why were you taken to Blackgate for the charges?"

"I was framed!" Crane reached across the table and grabbed Riddler by the collar. Riddler got out of his grip and straightened his shirt as Crane calmed down and said, "I was at Boone's lab, yes, but I started no fire."

"And why were you there?"

"You're the Riddler," Crane smirked. "You figure it out."

The Riddler smiled at him. Crane was somebody that he could respect. The Riddler took a breath and said, "If my guesses are correct, I'd say you were Boone's lab stealing ingredients for your new drug that was being sold to Great White Shark."

"Well - "

"I'm not finished," Riddler grinned. "While there, the thought crossed your mind to take out Dr. Boone altogther. After all, he _was _a fool. But, unfortunately, someone else was there too and started a fire, blaming the little mishap on you."

"Not bad," Crane replied.

"Do you know why Great White Shark wanted your drugs?" Riddler asked.

"I personally don't care what he - "

"He was kidnapping girls using your drug," Riddler explained. "He used the girls for prositution . . . including Ms. Harleen Quinzel."

"Harley Quinn?" Crane's eyes shot open. "The poor girl. I had no idea that White was capable of such things. I always thought he stuck to embezzling money."

"As did I," Riddler nodded. "Harley's in the hospital. And I do believe we need to fetch her."

* * *

That night, around 1 a.m., at the hospital, Harley Quinn slept silently in her bed. She suddenly awoke, screaming. The door flew open and a police officer ran in with his gun out, pointing it around the room.

"What happened?!" the officer yelled.

Harley embarrassingly smiled, "Bad dream." The officer laughed a bit and put his gun back in his holster. He began to walk away, but Harley stopped him. "Hey, where'd those other cops go?"

"Oh, they all went for some coffee. They should be back any minute, Ms. Quinzel," he replied.

"Call me Harley. Everyone does," she cheerfuly said.

The officer smiled and said, "Alright. My name's Tom."

"Tom, do you know if they arrested Great White Shark?" Harley asked, twirling her blonde hair in her finger. "I've been having nightmares about him. I still don't feel so good after he forced those drugs on me."

"Don't worry, Harley," Tom put his hand on her shoulder. "Great White Shark's been dealt with. Batman took him down and he was sent back to Blackgate Penitentiary."

"Good!" Harley smiled. "If you don't mind, Tom, I'm gonna get some shut eye. I don't feel so good."

"Alright, Harley," Tom smiled back. "If you need anything, just yell for me, okay?"

"Okay," Harley blushed as he walked out of the room and closed the door behind him. Harley laid back down in the bed and closed her eyes, hoping to get back to sleep and forget about the whole incident with Great White Shark and the drugs.

* * *

In the cafeteria of the hospital, three police officers stood around sipping coffee, laughing about some past experience with a stupid crook who accidently brought a gun with blanks to a robbery. Suddenly, they heard the faint noise of glass breaking.

One cop said, "Did you hear glass breaking right then?"

"I did," another nodded. "I'll go check it out."

The cop sat his coffee down, chambered a round in his pistol, then walked out of the cafeteria towards the front entrance of the hospital to check it out. He reached the front foyer and saw that a small drinking glass on the front desk had fallen off and broken. He sighed of relief and holstered his pistol. He turned to go back to the cafeteria to be face to face with the master of fear: Scarecrow.

"What do you fear most?" Scarecrow whispered as his fear toxin was sprayed directly into the police officer's face.

Scarecrow's face began emitting spiders as they crawled all over the police officer. He began batting them away, screaming at the top of his lungs, yelling, "They're biting me!"

The two other officers ran in to see the lone cop in the floor, grabbing at himself, like he was throwing something off. They tried to help him up but he kept screaming about the spiders.

"What the hell is he talking about?!" one of the cops asked the other as they tried to help the frantic one up.

"I believe he's scared."

The two cops turned around to see who had spoken. Suddenly, Scarecrow's fear toxin was sprayed in their faces as well as one began seeing snakes coiling around his legs, and the other saw his mother-in-law. They were on the ground screaming within sceonds. Scarecrow walked back into the shadows proudly.

* * *

"Tom!" Harley shouted calmly, as to not alert him.

Tom walked into the room and asked with a smile, "Yeah, Harley?"

"Could you get me a soda pop?" she asked with a big smile, trying to look cute.

Tom chuckled and nodded as he walked out of the room, heading down the hall to a pop machine. He bought a pop and returned to her. He handed it to her. "There ya go," he smiled.

"Thank you, Tom!" Harley giggled opening the can, taking a big gulp as Tom walked out of the room. As soon as the door was closed, Harley spit the pop out and looked at the can oddly. "RC Cola?" she glared at the can, then at the door. "Doesn't the guy know what a girl wants?" she rolled her eyes. "Hey Tom!" she politely yelled for him.

There was no reply.

Harley, becoming angry, yelled again, "Hey Tom, freakin' answer me!"

Still no reply.

Harley jumped out of bed and marched to the door. "Hey Tom, get me a - " she swung open the door but saw no Tom. Instead, looking down at her, was the pyromaniac villain known as Firefly. " - soda." she gulped, finishing her sentence.

Firefly kicked her hard in the stomach, knocking Harley back, hitting her head on the edge of the bed. She rubbed her head then quickly rolled out of the way as Firefly fire his flamethrower at her, crisping the spot she was in previously.

"Geeze, what'd I do to you?" Harley glared at him.

Firefly ignored her attitude and fire his flamethrower again. Harley jumped behind the bed, using it as cover from the flames. Harley looked under the bed to see Firefly's feet, and Tom laying in the hallway outside, burnt to a crisp. She shook her head sadly, groaning, "Oh Tom."

Harley decided to take action into her own hands. She grabbed a tray that food had brought to her on and hopped up from behind the bed, throwing the tray at Firefly as hard as she could, striking him directly in the face of his helmet. He stumbled back a bit and tripped over the body of Tom, landing back in the hallway, where he hit his head and sat motionless.

"Yay!" Harley cheered as she ran into the hallway and stuck her tongue out at Firefly, getting right in his face.

Suddenly, Firefly's hand jolted up and grabbed Harley by the throat. He stood up, stilling holding her and prepared his flamethrower. Right before launching a wave of fire into her face, Firefly looked over as he was kicked in the neck and sent tumbling down the hallway. Harley fell to the floor, gasping for air and looked up to see Scarecrow had saved her life.

"Dr. Crane," she smiled, looking up.

"Get downstairs, child," Scarecrow replied, his eyes fixed on Firefly. "Edward Nigma is waiting with a car."

"The Riddler?" Harley's eyebrows raised.

"Yes! Now, go!" Scarecrow yelled as Firefly got back to his feat and his jetpack launched him at Scarecrow. Harley ducked as Firefly headbutted Scarecrow, send them both through a wall into another room.

Harley wasted no more time. She got to her feet and ran towards the stairs as fast as she could. Firefly poked his head out from the hole he and Scarecrow had made and saw her running. He pointed his flame thrower at her, but Scarecrow tackled Firefly causing the flamethrower to shoot straight up into the air, scorching the ceiling.

Firefly kicked Scarecrow off and stood over him with his flamethrower pointed at his face. Firefly said, "If I remember, scarecrows don't like fire, do they?"

Scarecrow's eyes widened, fearing this would be the end. Yes, he was _afraid._

Right before Firefly could ignite Scarecrow, Harley Quinn appeared and swiped Firefly's leg out from under him, knocking him to the ground. Harley grabbed Scarecrow's hand and they began running down the hall. She said, "I couldn't just leave ya, Dr. Crane, after you saved me!"

"Thank you, child," Scarecrow let go of her hand and stopped running. "But, you go on. I'll keep him busy."

"No, Dr. Crane!" Harley screamed.

Suddenly, Firefly, using his jetpack, flew out of the room they had been in and down the hall towards them. Scarecrow unleashed a wave of fear toxin right in Firefly's path, but the pyromaniac flew right on through, not being affected because of his closed mask and flew right towards Scarecrow. Right when Crane thought he was hit, Firefly bypassed him and headed right for Harley Quinn.

Firefly grinned from behind his mask, but Harley threw up her leg and kicked him in the chin, directing him towards the ceiling as his jetpack launched right up through the ceiling onto the next floor.

"Shoo fly, don't bother me," Harley laughed.

Scarecrow grabbed her hand and they once again began making their way for the stairs. Scarecrow threw the stairwell door open and the two began walking down the stairs as fast as they could, trying to get out before Firefly could recover. But it was too late. Firefly burst through the wall and flew after them.

Firefly landed right in front of Harley and pointed his flamethrower at her. "Sorry, Quinn, you're fired."

"Oh, you can come up with something better than that!" Harley rolled her eyes putting her hands on her hips.

Firefly ignored her and pulled the trigger of his flamethrower. Fire bellowed out and Harley closed her eyes, but then realized she wasn't being burned. She opened her eyes to see that Scarecrow had stepped in front of her and blocked the flames. Firefly stopped the wave of fire, just as surprised as Harley. Scarecrow, though burnt, wasn't down. He punched Firefly in the face, shattering the front of his face mask, revealing his burnt and mutilated face. Then, Scarecrow sprayed fear toxin straight up his nose.

Firefly began screaming. In his eyes, Scarecrow's eyes sprayed fire, his mouth had razor sharp teeth, and Harley grew claws. Firefly batted them away as he activated his jetpack and flew straight up through the ceiling, trying to get away.

Harley laughed at him running, but then saw Scarecrow injured. She helped him stand. "Dr. Crane, why did you save me?"

"Because, dear," Scarecrow looked at her, "You have done nothing to deserve a burning."

"But, why did you even come here in the first place? What's going on?" she helped him walk down the stairs slowly.

"I came here to get you," Scarecrow coughed. "Firefly beat me here though. I couldn't let him destroy you, Ms. Quinn."

"Why was Firefly trying to kill me?" Harley asked as they reached the bottom level and headed to the entrance.

"That, I do not know," Scarecrow answered as they walked outside to see the Riddler leaned up against a car, waiting for them. Though not his limo from before, Riddler opened the back door to let Harley in, then Scarecrow got in the passenger seat and Riddler the driver's seat. They drove away from the hospital, back down the road.

"What happened in there?" Riddler asked.

"Firefly beat us to Harley," Dr. Crane took his mask off and threw it on the floorboard of the car as he breathed heavily. "The bastard did a number on me too."

"How are you, Ms. Quinn?" Riddler looked back at Harley.

She smiled, "I'm good, Eddie, how are you?"

"I'm well."

"I'm so sorry, Dr. Crane," Harley hopped up in the front seat, sitting between the two villains. "I'm so sorry that you got burned so badly." She frowned. She then clenched a fist and preached, "If I ever see that Firefly again, I'll - "

Suddenly, Firefly smacked down on the roof of the car. He punched his fist through the top and peered down at the three. Riddler shrugged, looking at Harley, "You were saying?"

Harley gulped, smiling nervously back at the Riddler.


	7. Light My Fire, Part 2

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 7 - LIGHT MY FIRE, PART 2**

The Riddler jerked the wheel hard, hoping to throw Firefly off the roof of the car, but the pyromaniac criminal held on tight. Firefly hopped onto the hood of the car and shattered the windshield with his foot. He stuck his flamethrower into the car.

Before he could fire it though, Crane kicked him hard in the face, causing Firefly to drop his flamethrower on the road, and the car quickly left it behind.

Harley laughed and said, "Not so tough without your flamethrower, are ya?"

Riddler rolled his eyes and said, "Never taunt an enemy with a jetpack, Ms. Quinn."

Firefly suddenly dove into the car and grabbed Harley, then catapulted himself back out the windshield and ignited his jetpack, zooming off in the direction they had come from. Riddler swung the car around and chased after them.

"Let me go!" Harley yelled as Firefly held onto her as he flew, trying to avoid oncoming cars. He was determined to get his flamethrower back. Harley then kicked him hard in the leg. He let go of her to grab his leg and as he did, Harley fell onto the pavement, knocking her unconscious.

Firefly then landed right next to her, his flamethrower in hand. A car honked at them, almost hitting them, but Firefly made short work of them as he ignited the car and it turned into a rolling fireball. Right before he was about to give Harley the same fate, Riddler smacked Firefly with the car, sending him flying.

Harley woke up as Riddler yelled, "Come on!"

She quickly got into the car and they drove away, once again. But, of course, Firefly was hot on their trail. He followed closely, his jetpack giving it everything it had.

Riddler growled, looking at Firefly in his rearview mirror, "Where's Batman when you need him?"

Firefly caught up and pulled the back passenger door of the car off and swooped in, grabbing Harley, and burst out the other side of the car, knocking the door off. They flew off ahead of the car, conveintently in the direction of the abandoned club that Riddler was heading to.

"That's odd," Riddler muttered as he drove faster.

He pulled the car into the alley where the club's door was. Scarecrow put his mask back on and said, "I'm sure this a trap."

"Well, duh!" Riddler smiled.

Riddler and Scarecrow got out of the car and walked to the door of the club. Riddler walked in slowly, followed by Scarecrow. All the lights were off, it was completely dark. But, suddenly, every light in the building switched on and to Riddler's surprise, Great White Shark stood before them, with a pistol to Harley Quinn's head. Firefly honorably stood behind him.

"Warren, old friend, what are you doing here?" Riddler took a step towards them.

"Don't come closer," Great White ordered as he jabbed Harley's head with the gun.

Harley groaned, "If I get out of this, you're dead, ya hear me?!" She began to fight Great White Shark, but he was too strong.

"But, you're not going to get out of this, you see," Great White growled.

"Warren, I thought you were on your way to Blackgate," the Riddler shrugged, trying not to piss him off.

"I was," Great White nodded. "But, while I was being transported there, Two-Face blew up a boat, so the cop car stopped to check it out. With the cops occupied with Dent, I made a break for it. I ran into Firefly and made my way back here."

"Firefly," Scarecrow clenched a fist. "You burned down Boone's lab, didn't you?"

"I couldn't risk the chance of you figuring out what I was using your drugs for, Crane," Great White Shark answered for him. "So, yeah, I hired Firefly to burn down Boone's lab. You were meant to die in the fire, Crane."

The Riddler said, "Why burn down the lab if - "

"I didn't need anymore drugs. I had enough!" Great White snapped. "So, Crane's usefulness had expired."

"You won't be getting back into business, Warren," the Riddler tried to calm him down. "Just let Harley go and - "

"It's not about business anymore, Nigma," Great White growled. "It's about revenge. You and your little Harley Quinn caused too much trouble for me and my businesses. So, you'll pay for it."

Harley suddenly got her head loose from Great White's grip and bit his arm, causing him to let go of her all together and take a step back. Harley spun around and kicked the gun from his hand, then kicked him back into a table, breaking it in half as he fell into it.

Firefly went to apprehend her, but Scarecrow punched him across the face. Firefly reached for his flamethrower, but Scarecrow landed another blow, right in Firefly's nose.

The Riddler adjusted his tie and took a seat in a chair across the room, watching the fights.

Great White got back to his feet and ran for Harley, but she catapulted herself over him and kicked him in the back, sending him into a couple chairs. He ran for her again, grabbing her by the neck and slamming her down onto the floor. He prepared to punch her, but she grabbed his head and headbutted him in the eye. Great White stumbled back in pain as Harley laid in pain, rubbing her forehead, groaning. Finally though, she jumped back up and kicked him across the face, grounding him again.

Firefly ducked from Scarecrow's punch, and punched him back in the stomach. Scarecrow didn't slow down though.

Great White Shark grabbed his pistol and swung around to shoot Harley, but she quickly kicked it from his hands again, sending it flying across the room, landing on the Riddler's lap. The two kept fighting though, ignoring the gun. Great White punched Harley in the jaw, causing her to fly back and trip over Firefly's flamethrower. Great White went to grab her, but she kicked him hard in the chest, sending him flying.

Firefly punched Scarecrow and went to grab his flamethrower, but it was gone. He looked up to see Harley Quinn had it in her hands, pointing it at his face. Harley grinned evilly and pulled the trigger. The flamethrower bellowed fire right into Firefly's face. He screamed taking cover, shielding himself with his arms as Harley stopped firing and watched Firefly moan in pain.

Great White Shark crept up behind Harley, but before attacking her, Riddler fired the pistol into the air, ceasing everyone and bringing all attention to himself. He pointed it at Great White Shark. "I don't think so," he said.

Harley spun around to Great White had almost attacked her. She dropped the flamethrower and joined the Riddler, along with Scarecrow. Firefly, moaning and about to pass out, stood up next to Great White Shark.

"What should we do with 'em?" Harley eagerly asked.

"Maybe we should . . ." the Riddler smiled mischievously. "Hang them in the freezer?"


	8. The Plan Unfolds

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 8 - THE PLAN UNFOLDS**

"Wee!" Harley backflipped around the club's main floor, now dressed in her usual red and black jester-attire. She stopped and saw Riddler grinning, sitting at a table, with Scarecrow next to him. She said, "You know, Eddie, I was trying to turn over a new leaf."

"I know, Ms. Quinn," Riddler nodded.

"This big plan of yours better be worth it for me to go back to crime," she put her hands on her hips. "And also, I don't want us to kill no cops! They've been so nice to me lately!"

"Only one person has to die in this plan of mine," the Riddler cupped his hands.

"So what is the plan, anyway?" Harley happily asked.

"We are going to get the Batman. We will unmask him. We will kill him," the Riddler said.

Harley remained silent, staring at the Riddler, almost as if she was waiting for him to say something else. She rubbed her chin and said, "That's it?" The Riddler cocked an eyebrow as she continued. "We're going to find out who Batman is and kill him? We won't be getting rich? We won't be blowing up Gotham? We won't be taking over the world?"

"I understand that this isn't your usual area of - "

"Mr. J would have a better plan," Harley crossed her arms, looking away from them.

"Mr. J?" Scarecrow asked.

"The Joker," the Riddler glanced at him, then looked back at Harley. "Harley, my dear," the Riddler stood up and walked over to her. "Wouldn't Mr. J be oh so pleased if you killed the Batman?"

"No," Harley shook her head quickly, "I almost killed Batman once, so Mr. J pushed me out a window."

The Riddler looked back at Scarecrow oddly, who shrugged, then Riddler turned back to Harley and said, "Okay . . ." he cleared his throat. "Harley, one step of our plan is breaking a certain kitty out of Arkham Asylum. If you help me, we'll break out the Joker too."

"Really?!" Harley cheerfully shrieked. "You promise?"

"I promise, Harley."

"No take-backs!"

The Riddler hesitantly muttered, "Uh . . . okay . . ." He then explained to Harley, "You worked at Arkham. I know that deep in your mind, you know the security codes still. Scarecrow will take out the guards while you - "

"Um, Mr. Riddle-er," Harley rubbed the back of her head nervously, "I _do_ remember the codes actually. But . . ."

"But?"

"Whenever the power goes out in Arkham Asylum, everything has to be reset. Security codes, computer passwords, everything. The power has gone out multiple times since I've worked there. So, the codes that I know won't work." she explained.

The Riddler's smile slowly turned to an angry frown. He clenched a fist and put his hands in his pockets, trying to keep himself calm. He grumbled, "So I've been wasting all my time with this plan?"

"Sorry, Eddie," Harley shrugged with a smile. "So, when do we break Mr. J out?"

The Riddler, his face red with hatred, turned to Harley and said, "Are you a bloody fool? How can we break Mr. J out if we can't get into Arkham Asylum, you idiot?!"

Harley nervously stepped back. She was quite used to be treated this way. She gulped, "Well, I mean, everything in Arkham is powered electronically anyway. Heh, heh," she kept stepping back as Riddler stepped towards her, considering punching her in the face. "True you can't get in with the security codes," she stumbled back and fell into a chair as the Riddler leaned in towards her, steam shooting from his ears. "But if all the power in town went out, every door in Arkham would be unlocked!" She shielded her face with her hands.

The Riddler instantly stopped. A smile formed on his face. He grabbed Harley by the face and lifted her up. "Harley, girl, you're a genius!" He then kissed her on the forehead and threw her back into the chair as he walked back to Scarecrow. "Crane, she's right! If all the power goes off, the doors are unlocked!"

"How do you expect to turn the power off?" Scarecrow asked.

"The Gotham Power Plant, of course," the Riddler grinned. "It supplies all the power in the city. We go there and we shut it off. All of it!"

"Then we free Mr. J?" Harley nervously asked.

Riddler turned back to Harley and replied, "Yes, Harley, then we free Mr. J."

* * *

The next morning, the police were in Great White Shark's club . . . again, but Riddler, Scarecrow, and Harley Quinn were long gone. Bullock had been talking to a few other officers, trying to figure out the scene when Commissioner Gordon walked up.

"What's the story?" Gordon asked.

"A few people on the streets heard a gunshot," Bullock explained. "Looks like there was a fight of some sort here." He continued, "We're trying to figure out if White came back here or anything after escaping."

"Sir!" an officer yelled from the freezer. "You may want to see this!"

Gordon and Bullock quickly ran to the freezer to see what the officer had been yelling about. Gordon's mouth dropped open. Great White Shark and Firefly were hanging upside down, hooks stabbed through their feet attached the ceiling. Both of them were unconscious, but still alive. On Great White Shark's body, there was a note taped.

Gordon walked over and grabbed the note, reading it aloud, "The more you have of it, the less you see."

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" Bullock shrugged as several cops got Great White Shark and Firefly down from the ceiling.

"It's a riddle," Gordon crushed the note in his hand. "The Riddler did this."

"The Riddler?" Bullock shook his head. "I've never known the Riddler to do anything _this_ brutal. Hanging guys with hooks in their feet?"

"Jonathon Crane's with him," Gordon looked back at Bullock. "The Scarecrow."

"Um, Commissioner," Bullock rubbed the back of his head. "This may be a bad time to tell you," he gulped, "But, last night, Harley Quinn disappeared from the hospital. There were sightings of Scarecrow and Firefly there."

Gordon's face turned red. "Why didn't anyone tell me?!" And he stormed off.

* * *


	9. Who Turned Out All the Lights?

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 9 - WHO TURNED OUT ALL THE LIGHTS?**

The cold air blew softly. The darkness covered the city. Screams could be heard in the distance. About an hour ago, all of the power in Gotham City had been shut off. The cititzens didn't know why. The police didn't know why. The Batman didn't even know why.

But, the Riddler knew why.

Only moments after the sun had set, the Riddler, Harley Quinn, and Scarecrow had snuck into the Gotham Power Plant, took out the guards, and shut all the power in town off. Gotham City was pitch black.

Earlier that day, Gordon spoke to Batman about the Great White Shark's body being found in his old club, hanging in the freezer. Batman took the riddle that was attached. It read: The more you have of it, the less you see.

Batman now realized that the answer to the riddle was **darkness.**

The Riddler obviously had done this, no doubt with the help of Harley Quinn and Scarecrow. He just didn't know why.

* * *

Arkham Asylum was going mad. The patients were running around everywhere, the guards trying to contain them. The Riddler, Scarecrow, and Harley Quinn proudly walked down the halls, ignoring guards and inmates.

The Riddler felt ominous as he walked. It felt like time had slowed down for him. He had done this. He freed Arkham Asylum.

Harley stopped, looking down a different hall as Riddler and Scarecrow kept walking. Harley peered down the hall, darkness consuming it. She took a few steps forward, slightly nervous. All around her, inmates were going crazy, finding exits to escape.

Harley made her way to the end of the hallway where there was a giant, lead door. She reached out for the handle, but someone's hand on her shoulder startled her, causing her to swing around and face Poison Ivy.

"Ivy!" Harley let out a sigh of relief. "You scared me!"

"Sorry, Harl," Ivy replied, "What's going on? Did you do all this? I thought you weren't doing the whole crime thing anymore."

"I'm helping someone," Harley answered. "It's gonna be worth it, I promise. You wanna help?"

"No thanks," Ivy smiled, running her hand through her hair. "Just thought I'd say hello. I'm gonna split before the cops show up."

"They won't be here for a long time, Ivy!" Harley happily said. "The power's out in Gotham. City-wide blackout! They still can't even figure out what's going on! It's great!" She smiled big.

"Who exactly are you helping?" Ivy asked.

"Yes, Harley, who exactly are you helping?"

* * *

The Riddler and Scarecrow entered a lounge area of Arkham. Naturally, it was dark in here, but it was also quiet. Scarecrow whispered to the Riddler, "Are you sure she's here?"

"She's here, alright," the Riddler whispered back.

Suddenly, Catwoman jumped down from a stair banister, landing in front of them. She latched her whip around Scarecrow's foot and brought him to the ground, as she kicked Riddler in the stomach, sending him back against a wall.

"Ms. Kyle, please!" the Riddler coughed, regaining his balance.

"What's going on, Nigma?" Catwoman demanded to know.

Scarecrow got up and said, "Mind if I gas her?"

"Not just yet," Riddler smirked, then noticed Catwoman glaring at him. He waved his hands in defense. "I was just kidding, Selina!"

"Not trying to get out of the Asylum while you can, Riddler?" Catwoman asked, putting her hand on her hip.

"Ha!" the Riddler burst out. "I'm not even a patient here. I'm the one who just broke you and everyone else out. It's _you_ who should be trying to run and get out of the asylum, Selina." Catwoman just stared him down. Riddler continued, "Would you like to help us, Selina?"

"Help you do what?" Catwoman replied, rolling her eyes.

"Why, he wants to unmask the bat, of course!" a voice yelled out, laughing as he spoke.

The doors opened and the Joker and Harley Quinn stepped in, slamming the door shut behind them. The Riddler's eyes widened as he saw the Joker's horrible grin fixed on him. Scarecrow prepared himself for anything, and Catwoman grew bored.

The Joker laughed, "Hey, who turned out all the lights?"

"Look, I found Mr. J, Eddie!" Harley grabbed onto Joker's arm.

"Yes, Eddie," the Joker got out of her grip and walked towards the Riddler, "She found me. And what did you find, hmm?" He smiled in the Riddler's face, showing his yellow teeth.

"You know, Joker," Riddler cleared his throat, "I think you would be a fine addition to our little team here."

"Oh?" the Joker smiled, like he was honored, though it was obviously sarcasm. "I'm so happy you think so, Eddie!"

"What the hell is goin' on?" Catwoman asked.

The Joker put his arm around Catwoman and said, "It seems that our dear friend Mr. Nigma has devised a most inglorious plan that involves us trapping the Batman and yanking his mask off once and for all!"

Catwoman lifted Joker's arm off of her and stepped away from him. Harley said, "Yeah, and Mr. J, he said we could kill him afterwards!" She nodded happily, wanting to please him.

"Afterwards?" the Joker shrugged as he pulled a pistol from inside his purple suit and stuck it to Riddler's head. "Why not just kill him _now_?"

"Wait, Mr. J!" Harley put the gun down, trying to save the Riddler. "I meant Batman! He said we could kill Batman."

"Funny," the Joker lifted his eyebrows, "I meant Riddler."

The Riddler grinned, "I, of course, know that you'd pleasure in nothing more but killing me as a sadistical joke that only you would get, Joker, but for the time being, I am asking you for assistance."

"Assistance, eh?" the Joker crossed his arms. "Well, when I ran into Harley girl," he patted Harley on the head, causing her to giggle, "She told me the jist of the plan, but I don't see where I come in."

"Well that's one of the greatest riddles of all time, Joker," the Riddler smiled. "Where do any of us come in?"

Scarecrow, Catwoman, and Harley stared blankly at the Riddler, not understanding what he meant. But, somewhere in Joker's twisted mind, he understood the Riddler and smiled, "Riddler, ol' boy, I'm in."

The Riddler grinned with satisfaction, then turned to Catwoman, "Now, Catwoman, we'll be needing you as well. Come with us."

"What?" she took a step back. "No way, I'm not going with you. I don't want in on your plan, Nigma."

"Scarecrow, if you would," the Riddler looked over to Dr. Crane.

"I will not cooperate," Catwoman prepared to fight.

The Riddler laughed and said, "Oh, I'm counting on it."

* * *


	10. The Joke's On You, Part 1

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 10 - THE JOKE'S ON YOU, PART 1**

Selina Kyle opened her eyes slowly. Her mask had been ripped off, her Catwoman jumpsuit torn a little. She could barely remember a thing, but she recalled fighting off Scarecrow as he sprayed her with fear toxin. She was pretty sure that the Joker had knocked her out too.

She tried to stand but then realized she was tied up, ropes circling down her body. She lifted her head to figure out where she was and gasped at the sight of all of Gotham City surrounding her. She was lying on the roof of Wayne Enterprises, the tallest building in Gotham. Not only that, but there had been recent construction at Wayne Enterprises, so the top few floors of the building were under construction, meaning a lot of scaffholding and a lot of places to fall down . . . very far.

"Riddle me this!" the Riddler appeared, jumping down from a taller section of the building. "Why did Catwoman rob the jewelry store?" He didn't even wait for her to answer. "To get some puuurls!"

"Lame," Harley jumped up from some scaffholding below. "Sorry, kitty," she shrugged with a smile, "But we kinda needed ya. You won't get hurt though, don't worry. As soon as we off the bat, you're free to go."

"Harley, Harley, Harley," the Joker stepped out from the shadows, "Don't _lie _to her!" he laughed hysterically.

"What do you want with me?" Selina struggled to get free.

"You're the bait," Scarecrow appeared from behind Joker and answered. "For the bat."

"So, Riddler," Selina glared at him. "How is Batman gonna know to come here for me?"

"Ha, ha, ha!" the Riddler laughed. "I was _hoping_ you'd ask! In only moments, the power of Gotham will be turned back on by our dear friends Tweedledum and Tweedledee, who were recently sprang from Blackgate by a few associates."

"That's it?" Selina rolled her eyes.

"No, no," the Riddler bent down to her level, grinning, "The rest is a surprise."

In an instant, the power to the city returned. Lights came back on, generators were started, it all came back. Then, something odd happened to the lights in the Wayne building. Only certains lights in certain windows came on. The illuminated lights formed a giant arrow pointing to the roof and under the arrow, the light spelled out the words: **What always lands on its feet when dropped from 102 stories?**

The Riddler smiled evilly back at Selina, "He should be here anytime now."

"Eddie, old friend," the Joker walked over to him. "A question," he rubbed his chin. "When Batsy gets here, what do you intend to do with him?"

"Let me worry about that, Joker," the Riddler said. "All you gotta worry about is shooting him, once I unmask him."

* * *

Batman piloted the Batwing towards Wayne Enterprises. He spoke to Commissioner Gordon on the radio. He said, "Gordon, this is Batman. The Riddler's on top of Wayne Enterprises."

"How do you know?" Gordon replied.

"Look at the building," Batman said. "I'm sure Scarecrow and Quinn are with him. And I think . . ."

"What? Think what?" Gordon asked.

"Nothing," Batman said, switching the radio off. He said to himself, "Selina..."

Suddenly, Batman saw something. A missile was heading straight for the Batwing. It was too late, he couldn't pilot away. He pressed the eject button and he was launched out of the Batwing as it exploded. He was close to the building at least, as he glided onto the lowest level of construction, at about the 96th floor.

When he landed, he looked up to see Harley Quinn with a rocket launcher in her hand. She grinned and smacked him across the face with it. Batman flew back, almost falling off the side. He climbed back up as Harley, after throwing the rocket launcher down, walked over to him and put a gun to his head.

"Quinn," Batman grunted. "Why are you doing this?"

"Sorry, Bats," she shrugged. "Business is business."

"You were free though," he sighed. "You had a chance."

"Yeah, and it was nice for a little while," she nodded with a smile. "Until that deformed bastard Great White Shark kidnapped me for that prostitution crap. That made me realize that being a civilian here in Gotham . . . it just doesn't work."

"It _does _work, Harley," Batman said, standing to his feet which made Harley nervous as she backed up, still pointing the pistol at him.

"No, it _doesn't_!" she screamed. "I tried, Batman! I tried! And luckily, that Great White _dick_ got what was coming to him!"

"You hung Great White Shark up by his feet with those hooks, didn't you?" Batman asked.

"Yeah, I did," she shrugged. "Hell, I wanted to kill the jackass. But, Riddler and Dr. Crane wouldn't let me." She pulled the hammer back on the pistol. "Listen, B-Man, I really wanted to turn over a new leaf. But, I had no friends. I had nothing! This is my life. I have to deal with that. And so does everyone else."

"You still have a chance, Harley," Batman said, trying to calm her down. "Put the gun down. Don't do anyting that you can't fix. There's no one here controlling you. You are the one who chooses your life."

"Very inspiring!" a voice cheered.

Harley, startled, looked back behind her, trying to see who had said that. Batman used this time to grab the gun from Harley's hand and hit her in the side, sending her to the ground.

"Hey! Don't hit her!" the Joker jumped down. "I'm the only one who can touch her." The Joker grinned as he punched Batman in the face, then kicked him in the chest, causing him to stumble back into some construction equipment, knocking him out.


	11. The Joke's On You, Part 2

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 11 - THE JOKE'S ON YOU, PART 2**

Batman opened his eyes to see he was hanging upsidedown. The villains, after knocking him out, had suspended him off the edge of the building, with him tied up, upside down. He looked to the streets, then back straight ahead to see Riddler, Joker, Harley Quinn, and the Scarecrow staring at him. Then, he saw Selina Kyle tied up on the ground with duct tape over her mouth as she tried to scream for him.

"Selina..." he grumbled.

"Told you he'd come for her," the Riddler elbowed Scarecrow in the side with a smile.

"What ever it is you want," Batman said, "You want it with me. Let Selina go."

"No dice, Bats," the Joker grinned, sticking a pistol in his mouth. "Looks like you're in quite the predicament, if you ask me." He removed the gun as Batman gritted his teeth, wanting to bash Joker's face in.

The Riddler stepped forward, pushing Joker out of the way, which angered him. Riddler said to Batman, "I've waited so long for this. It's what I've lived for!" He took a deep breath and said, "Riddle me this, riddle me that, who's the man behind the bat?"

The Riddler put his hands on Batman's mask and gripped it tight. He started to pull it off but Batman burst out, "Wait, Nigma!" The Riddler, startled, let go to hear what he had to say. Batman asked, "This is what you've lived for?"

"Yeah," the Riddler replied matter-of-factly.

"If it's what you've lived for, then what will you do once you reveal me?" Batman cleverly asked. "What will be the ultimate riddle to solve then?"

The Riddler's hands dropped to his side as he listened closely to Batman.

Batman continued, "Sure, you could pull my mask off. You could see who I am. But then, whether or not you kill me, you'll have nothing, Nigma. No more great riddles. No more Batman to solve your riddles. You'll be empty. Nothing to do."

The Riddler looked back at the other villains, who seemed to know that Batman was simply trying to fool the Riddler. But, from a certain point of view, the Riddler knew that Batman was right.

Batman said, "So go ahead, Nigma. Pull it off. But first, tell me. What next? Are you gonna just go home? Go try to unmask another hero?"

The Riddler sighed, "I think he's right." He frowned and started to turn away. Then, though, he regained his happy attitude and turned back to Batman saying, "Ah well, all riddles need to be solved at some point!" He laughed as he gripped the mask again.

"Stop."

The Riddler looked behind him to see that Joker had a gun pointed at him. The Riddler let go of the mask and nervously asked, "What are you doing, Joker?"

"He's right," the Joker said, not smiling, "I don't want to know who the Batman is."

"Why not?!" the Riddler screamed, losing his cool.

"Puddin'," Harley tried to ease the Joker, "We came all this way to - "

The Joker backhanded Harley and turned his attention back to the Riddler. He said, "Get away from him, Nigma. You're not unmasking him."

"I _will_ unmask him!" the Riddler demanded, his hat flying off by the breeze and his hair messing up, getting in his eyes, making him look even more like a lunatic.

"I'm being compassionate for once, Nigma," the Joker said, still not smiling, "Take advantage of that. Step away from him." He pulled the hammer back on his gun.

Harley suddenly stepped in front of the Riddler, to block any attacks that Joker threw. She screamed, "Mr. J, don't shoot him!"

"Get away from him, Harley," the Joker ordered.

"No, puddin'," she shook her head. "He saved my life! He saved me from Great White Shark! He and Scarecrow saved me from Firefly! The Riddler has done nothing but help me these last few - "

_BAM!_

The Joker pulled the trigger sending a bullet straight into Harley's shoulder. She screamed falling to the ground, gripping the wound. Scarecrow's eyes shot open, unsure of whether or not he should help her. He didn't want to get shot too.

"Puddin'?" Harley looked up at the Joker with tears in her eyes.

The Joker looked at the Riddler, ignoring Harley, and said with an evil grin, "It's been fun."

Suddenly, having been working on getting loose, Selina pounced on Joker. Being startled, Joker fired his gun. The bullet went straight for the Riddler, but luckily it didn't land any fatal shot. The bullet clipped the Riddler's cheek, causing him to scream out in pain and fall off a ledge, landing in some of the lower construction areas.

The Joker threw Selina off and prepared to shoot her, but Harley grabbed the Joker's ankle and bit down on his skin. He screamed out as he kicked Harley hard in the face, knocking her away. He turned back to Selina but she kicked the gun from his hand and landed a few punches on him.

Scarecrow ran to Harley and helped her to her feet. He began to escort her away but Harley stopped, looking back at Batman, who was helpless to help Selina or stop the Joker. Harley said to Scarecrow, "Go on, Dr. Crane. This time, I have to stay behind."

"Are you sure, Harley?" Scarecrow asked, eager to get away before Batman was free, but then again, he didn't want to leave Harley there alone with that madman the Joker.

"Yes, go," she nodded as Scarecrow smiled from behind his mask and made his way down the stairs. While Joker and Catwoman fought, neither noticed Harley walking over to Batman.

Batman said, "If the Joker finds out you're helping me, he'll kill you."

"Yeah, so what?" she shrugged with a smile. "Wouldn't be the first time."

Catwoman threw another punch at Joker, but the Clown Prince of Crime blocked her attack and punched her hard in the throat, sending her to the ground in pain. He picked up his pistol and pointed it at her. He laughed, "Cat got your tongue?"

Someone then tapped Joker on the shoulder. He turned his head angrily, expecting Harley Quinn or the Riddler. But, it was Batman's fist. Batman punched Joker right in the mouth, causing Joker to drop his gun off the side of the building, and knock out one of his teeth.

Selina smiled and jumped up, hugging Batman. He gently pushed her away as he said, "Get out of here, Selina. Take Quinn with you. I'll handle the Joker."

The Joker's head poked up and he questioned, "Quinn?" He looked over at Harley, who was standing where Batman had been tied up. The Joker got on his feet and walked towards her slowly. "Harley?"

"Y-Yes, Mr. J?" she nervously replied.

"You _freed _him?" the Joker's mouth dropped open. "We may not were going to unmask him . . . but we were still going to kill him!" He ran for Harley, his hands ready to strangle her.

Batman, though, grabbed Joker by the back of the shirt and drug him away, slinging him into some pipes that were lying out, used for the construction of the building. The Joker growled, "I _saved _you, Batman, from the Riddler!"

"You've never saved anyone," Batman approached him. "You just didn't want Nigma to have the pleasure of defeating me. You wanted the glory. It's always _you_, Joker. You even shot the most loyal person you have."

The Joker looked behind Batman to see Selina helping Harley limp towards the stairs. He called out, "Harley? Harley, get away from her! She's trying to hurt you, Harley!"

Harley looked over to him, confused on what she should do. Selina said to Harley, "He just _shot_ you! Don't listen to him!"

"Listen to me, Harley," the Joker clenched a fist. "Harley!" the Joker charged for her. Batman tried to stop him, but Joker pushed him out of the way, knocking him on his back. Right before the Joker reached them, three gunshots sounded out, one by one.

The Joker looked down to see that bullets had shot straight through his back and came out of his chest. The Joker, Batman, Harley Quinn, and Selina all turned to see the Riddler with a pistol in his hand and a scar on his cheek had just shot the Joker.

Joker said, "You shot me?"

"You shot me first," the Riddler shrugged.

The Joker, though hurt, wasn't done completely. He held his hand behind his back, a grenade in his hand, which he had kept hidden the whole time just in case something like this happened.

The Riddler picked up a lead pipe and approached the Joker. Batman yelled, "Nigma, stop! This isn't going anywhere!"

"He ruined it!" the Riddler clenched his teeth. "He ruined my plan! It would've worked!"

The Joker burst out laughing, blood dripping from his mouth. He said, "If you think that it would've worked," he pulled the pin from the grenade, "I guess the joke's on you, Eddie." The Joker threw the grenade towards the Riddler like a baseball.

Batman dove for it, but missed, landing back on the ground and he watched it hurl towards the Riddler. The Riddler, though, swung at it with the pipe in his hands as he yelled, "No, the joke's on you this time!" A direct hit and the grenade was heading back towards the Joker.

In the split second before it exploded, the Joker frowned as he tilted his head on the side, "I don't get it."

It exploded. In the mass ball of fire, the Joker was catapulted a ways before crashing through the floor, ending up on a lower level of the building, hidden by black smoke and fire.

Harley and Selina were speechless. Had the Riddler just killed the Joker? Batman got to his feet and ran for the Riddler, but Nigma dodged his attack and hit Batman with the lead pipe in the back.

"No, Batman!" Riddler growled. "I won't let _you _ruin this either!"

"You've truly gone mad, Nigma," Batman tried to stand up, but the Riddler hit him hard on the back with the pipe.

"NO!" Selina ran for the Riddler, but he swung around and hit her in the side with the pipe, sending her to the ground next to Batman.

"Selina!" Batman screamed as he jumped up and tackled the Riddler.

They both went flying and fell through the weak floor, ending up in a dark, dusty area of the construction. Batman had even landed on a piece of sharp metal that went straight through his arm. He pulled it out slowly, screaming as he did as suddenly, the Riddler hit him across the face with the pipe.

Batman looked up to see they had fallen a couple stories down. He wanted to yell for Selina, but couldn't see her, nor did he have the energy to yell. The Riddler smacked him once more, breaking his nose.

He stood over Batman and began walking around him, dragging the pipe. He said as he walked, "It was going so well. Harley, Scarecrow, and I would take Selina. You'd come for her. I'd unmask you. Hell, I didn't even plan on killing you, but Harley and Joker wanted to so bad that I decided to give them their fun!"

Batman spit up blood, then muttered, "Nigma, you don't have to - "

"Don't tell me what I do and don't have to do!" the Riddler snapped, interrupting him. "Joker. Joker." he repeated. "That son of a bitch. _He_ ruined this. He couldn't just go through with the plan!" He shook his head. "_He_ had to get rid of Batman. If _he_ doesn't do it, _nobody_ can!"

Batman wanted to scream so bad. He needed help.

"Now, let's see who's behind the mask!" the Riddler threw the pipe aside and knelt down to Batman. He gripped the mask and slowly began to pull it off, but then... he stopped. He began to think, then he said, "You know, Batman, you may have been right before."

"Nigma, I can help you," Batman coughed, finding it difficult to breathe.

"No," the Riddler shook his head with a smile, "Nobody can help me now. I am beginning to fear that I may truly be . . . insane." The Riddler pulled out a knife from inside his jacket. "I don't know if I should unmask the Batman or not. What do you think?"

"Nigma, please, you have to listen to me," Batman said.

"What if I unmask you, and it turns out you're someone like," he looked around, pondering, then turned back to Batman, "Someone like the Penguin or something? Or, Two-Face? Or Comissioner Gordon? What if you're my father? Or, my secret son?"

Batman was done trying to talk sense into the Riddler. There was no point in it. He had _lost_ it.

"What if..." the Riddler's eyes widened. "What if _I'm_ Batman?" He looked down at him. "Well, we can't risk that, can we?" The Riddler raised the knife high into the air, preparing to stab him in the chest. Before stabbing though, he said, "Riddle me this, riddle me that... what's big and black and not coming back?"

Batman's eyes widened. He truly did not know what he was going to do. The Riddler was going to kill him. Right as the Riddler was about to bring down the knife onto his chest, he heard a _thud_ noise.

The Riddler's eyes shot open, his mouth dropped, he dropped the knife and fell onto his face, smack down onto the hard concrete, knocked unconscious. Batman looked up to see Harley Quinn with a lead pipe in her hand.

"Quinn?" Batman was shocked.

"I guess I _can_ choose my life," she smiled as she dropped the pipe and gripped the bullet wound in her shoulder.

A helicopter's roar bellowed out as it shined a light onto Batman, Harley, and the Riddler's knocked out body. SWAT team kicked open a door and piled in, machine guns at the ready.

"Hands up, Harley Quinn!" one yelled pointing his gun at Harley who instantly threw her hands up.

One SWAT team officer helped Batman up as he said, "Be easy on her," he stood on his own put his hand on Harley's shoulder, "She saved my life."

The Riddler opened his eyes as several machine guns were stuck into his face. He gulped and shrugged with a groan, "Wanna hear a riddle?"

Batman, Harley, and the Riddler were taken back to the roof as the helicopter landed. Gordon stepped out as Batman walked up. Gordon said, "Good job." He watched the Riddler be taken onto the helicopter and shook his head, "What a jackass."

Batman chuckled, then looked over to see the police helping Selina to her feet, tending her wounds. Selina smiled at Batman, and he smiled back as she was put onto the helicopter.

Harley Quinn was brought over to Batman and Gordon in handcuffs, a police officer walking with her. Harley said, "Thank you, Batman, really." She then looked at Commissioner Gordon and said with a big smile, "Did ya find that fish I left hanging in the freezer?"

Gordon laughed as he said, "Yeah, and he's back in custody. You don't have to worry about him hurting you, Ms. Quinn. He won't be going to Arkham. Neither will Firefly."

Harley smiled then began to walk to the helicopter, but Batman yelled for her, "Harley!" She walked back to him as Batman continued. "Thank you . . . for saving me. I would've been a goner if you hadn't knocked out Riddler." He stuck out his hand to shake hers.

She cheerfully smiled as she shook his hand and said, "No problamo, B-Man! Happy to help!"

Another officer walked over to Gordon, "Commissioner, we just caught Scarecrow. He was trying to escape."

"Good," Gordon nodded.

"Awww, poor Dr. Crane," Harley frowned. "Don't be _too_ mean to him, Commissioner."

Gordon laughed and walked back to the helicopter. Batman said to Harley, "I look forward to you earning your way out of Arkham soon, Ms. Quinn. It shouldn't be too long . . . especially after Batman puts in a good word for you." He smiled.

Harley's frown instantly turned into a gigantic smile as she giggled and skipped to the helicopter, the police officer trying to keep up. Gordon watched Harley get on the helicopter, then turned to speak to Batman, but he was already gone. He shook his head and said, "I hate it when he does that."

Suddenly, from back in the lower levels, an officer yelled, "Hey, Commissioner, we got someone down here! You may wanna see this!"

Commissioner Gordon and a few other police officers ran to the place that the officer was yelling from. They all gasped.

The Joker was sprawled out across a large concrete block. He body was burnt badly, every inch of it covered in blood. The way he was lying, his back must've been broken. But, the most disturbing thing was... he was laughing.

"Get this monster outta here," Gordon ordered. "Back to Arkham."

The Joker's laugh got louder. He laughed more hysterically, even as cops and medics tried to help him. He just kept laughing, thinking the current situation was the most hilarious thing he'd ever experience.

One cop yelled at him, "Jesus Christ, shut up! Quit laughing!"

"But," the Joker coughed up blood as he calmed down and whispered, "I just got the joke and . . . it _is_ funny!" He burst out laughing again.

Harley even heard him from the helicopter, a shiver going up her spine. She took her hat off and threw it out of the helicopter onto the roof of the building as a cop shut the helicopter's door and it took off.

Even after taking off, Harley still heard the laughter.

* * *


	12. Epilogue

**BATMAN: GOTHAM TALES**

**CHAPTER 12 - EPILOGUE**

Commissioner Gordon walked down the halls of Arkham Asylum with a doctor walking next to him. They entered a long hallway where the rooms for the inmates were. They stopped at Scarecrow's, peering in at Jonathon Crane.

The doctor said, "Dr. Crane is doing very well, Commissioner. He's been cooperating and everything."

"Good," Gordon kept walking.

They stopped at Harley Quinn's cell.

Harley was on her bed, reading a book, but jumped up and ran to the glass walls to speak to Gordon. She happily said, "Hiya, Commissioner!"

"Hello Ms. Quinn," Gordon replied.

"Harley Quinn is doing very well, also," the doctor explained.

"Yeah, I'm serious about turning over a new leaf this time!" she nodded cheerfully.

Gordon smiled at her enthusiasm. He said to the doctor, "What became of the Riddler?"

The doctor led Commissioner Gordon down many halls until they finally stopped at a metal door. The doctor slid open a small viewing slide on the door as Gordon looked in. It was very dark.

Gordon said, "Edward? Can you hear me?"

"Yes."

The doctor whispered to Gordon, "He keeps saying he knows who Batman is."

Gordon said, "Edward, do you know who Batman is?"

"Yes." the Riddler, dressed in a straight jacket, stepped into the light with a smile on his face. "In a way, aren't we all Batman?"

Gordon shook his head and slammed the viewer shut. He straightened his jacket and said to the doctor, "Well, I think that's all I need to see. I don't even want to see the Joker."

"Oh, he's in the infirmary anyway," the doctor replied quickly.

It was almost on cue as laughter echoed throughout all of Arkham Asylum. The Joker had been burned horribly. The doctors were trying to help him, trying to fix him, even though they didn't want to. Who would want to help the Joker live? But, they had to.

The Joker thought the pain was funny. He was unable to speak, but in his mind, he was thinking, _"I guess Eddie was right. The joke really was on me. And it is pretty funny! Ha, ha, ha, ha!"_

**THE END**


End file.
